Tiger Woods has apparently hired former White House Press Secretary Ari Fleischer to help with damage control and a strategery… for returning to golf.   That may be as soon as the Arnold Palmer Invitational March 25 at Bay Hill.  Better get the satellite trucks and the helicopters ready….that won’t be too bizarre, will it?  Ari Fleischer recently advised embattled St. Louis Cardinals hitting instructor Mark McGwire on his public admission to using steroids.  Oh yeah, the Bob Costas interview. We all know how well that went.

Giants baseball is back! The Panda hit .330 last year without glasses.  What’s he gonna do with his new prescription lenses?  Can The Freak, Tim Lincecum still dominate after back-to-back Cy Young seasons?  Will Jonathan Sanchez settle in with a solid year?  And will the new bats…. Mark DeRosa and Aubrey Huff bring in some much-needed runs?  We’ll find out soon enough… I’m just excited to hear the crack of the bats again.

So the Olympics are over, and as much as I love Curling…I’m gonna miss those wacked out speedskating finals with Apolo Ohno.  Since Apolo is hated so much by the Koreans, why do we have to wait four years to see this rivalry?  Don’t the pinheads at the networks get it?  There’s a gold mine here.  A short track reality show… starring Apolo against a bunch of Korean thugs trying to take him down.  Our hero closes each match… Ice Dancing the rhumba with Julianne Hough… Man, I’d be there every night…

By now, anyone who’s watching the Olympics knows about Dutch star Sven Kramer, the most dominant speedskater in the world.  A week after infamously asking a television reporter “Are You Stupid?”….. he made a wrong lane change that cost him a gold medal in the 10,000 meters, a race he hadn’t lost in three years.   Yeah, it’ll be tough to live down one of the worst blunders in Olympic history.  Maybe it was retribution… or karma.  And there are plenty of people who are glad he lost.  But I saw the original question from the NBC reporter.  It was stupid.

The Kings are trying to salvage some pride..  The Giants have arrived at Spring Training… and the Vancouver Olympics are wrapping up.  But for the football crazies (didn’t we just see the Super Bowl?),  there are only two seasons.  Football season…. and “getting ready for football season.”  Something  called “The NFL Combine” looms this weekend.    It’s a four-day pageant… where the nation’s top college players get to show how well they can run, jump and lift stuff.  Oh, and there’s an item in the Bleacher Report touting Alex Smith as a Top Five quarterback next season.  I’m getting sweaty……it’s never too early to get pumped.

It is kind of an odd site.  I’m sure you’ve noticed that Olympic star Apolo Ohno likes to yawn before his speedskating events. Apparently, for the most decorated US Winter Olympian of all time, this is all part of his strategy… to get extra oxygen into his lungs just before the big moment.  Sounds good to me… but you are making me yawn right now….

I must say, I was impressed.  Tiger’s “apology” was 14 minutes. That’s about 11 minutes longer than I thought it would be.  Yes, there will be plenty of people who’ll vilify him no matter what.  Fine.  Was it an apology? Yes.  Was it humiliating? Yes.  But I realized.. he’s still in control.  No questions, no Oprah, no nothing.  And I’m so glad his wife decided not to stand there.  Props to Elin.  As for the PGA Tour… you’d better hope he comes back.  Your ratings have got to be in the toilet.  Without Tiger… come on… it’s a snoozefest.  How do you think those purses got so big… because of the presence of Rory Sabbatini?  Please.  Til Tiger returns, I’d rather watch NASCAR, drag racing, poker, and reruns of old baseball games on MLB.

The Detroit Free Press reports that The International Olympic Committee has forced United States hockey goalie Ryan Miller to cover up the part of his customized mask that reads, “Miller Time,” because, you know, that’s his name.  There’s an Olympic Committee rule that prohibits “advertising, demonstrations and propaganda,” so Ryan had to cover the “Miller Time” slogan with tape.  Of course, figure skater Johnny Weir shows up at the rink wearing heels, makeup and fur – and carrying a purse.  He’s okay there….

I keep hearing about people shouting from the rooftops about NBC’s Olympic coverage. They say, “Why can’t we watch Lindsey Vonn win the gold live?” “What about seeing Shawn White?”
Sure, I suppose NBC could run it live on MSNBC during the day and then run highlights in primetime, but have you noticed? NBC’s ratings are HUGE! You know why? Because we have to wait to see it in primetime! Most of us are busy during the day! NBC doesn’t beat American Idol by accident. They win because we hear that Lindsey Vonn won the gold at 2pm, then decide to tune in that night to watch how she did it. Trust me, if she placed 10th, no one would be tuning in at 8pm. It’s the fact that we have to wait, and want to see that incredible move by Shawn White that makes the difference. Vonn’s night last night had a 22 share, which is unheard of in any sport. NBC, love it or hate it, is doing it right.

The Kings hadn’t won a game all year.  Well, that’s not true… it only seemed that way.  But on Jewish Heritage Night in New York’s venerable Madison Square Garden, the Kings shocked the Knicks in an overtime thriller. Clutch baskets by Donte Green and  Kevin Martin reminded us of when these games used to be fun to watch.  And Omri Casspi, playing in front of a huge, supportive Jewish contingent….basked in the spotlight, and came through with an 18 point/ 9 rebound performance.  Oh, and that Tyreke Evans layup drill in the fourth quarter… still has Jared Jeffries looking for his athletic supporter…..